Author

Stephanie Gonzales

I married my 5th grade sweetheart and together with the Lord we are raising 3 rambunctious boys while working to not lose the essence of who we are. So fun but so cray cray, I have a gray hair in my eyebrow to prove it.

Why I Don’t Teach My Kids Santa Claus

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The Christmas season is in full force! Everywhere I look I see red velvet bows, decorative houses bright with lights, the classic Salvation Army rep spreading cheer and ringing bells at our local grocer entrance, and one of my favorites, the Holiday seasonal drinks from Starbucks!

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Born Still: Breaking the Silence and Normalizing Grief

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skyAnd then the world changed forever.

It was May 9th, 2011, an evening that was filled with anticipation and jittery excitement. My sister was on her way to the hospital to have my nephew Isiah!!! She told me that the doctor sent her to the hospital to maybe get induced, but that if not she would have to go back to the doctor the following week. At 39 weeks and 4 days, most pregnant women want their baby out by any means necessary! My sister was no different, she had a hospital bag packed, had already dropped her older children off to me, and set out with her husband to the hospital to bring her baby home. Little did we know she was on her way to receive jolting information that would forever change their lives.

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How I Discovered My Son Still Needs My Kisses

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When our children are newborn all the way up to toddler years, they really have no control over how much we kiss them. So I personally take FULL unapologetic advantage of this.

I remember one day when one of these kids (can’t remember which) was maybe 5/6 months, I tried to actually keep a tally of how many times I kissed him. I could literally plant 50 kisses on one fluffy cheek within a minute! So I just chalked myself up to #stalkermom cray cray, threw away the score card and kept on a’kissin.

My three sons are currently 7, 5, and 3! So just this morning it hit me that I don’t kiss my oldest son, Jabin, nearly as much as I kiss my 4 yr old, Caleb, whom in turn I don’t kiss nearly as much as I do the baby, Elijah! And yes, I know as our children get older, they go off to school, eventually start after school sports and other activities, etc, so the stalker mom kissing window gets smaller and smaller *stifling a wail just thinking about it*.

Most recent family photo! Easter 2016 :)
Most recent family photo! Easter 2016 🙂

So just this morning, Elijah came downstairs after he woke up, and I greeted him, like I do the others, with a big hug and excitement. “ELIJAHHH! You’re up! How’s my NuNu man! Give mommy a hug!” lol, you know, just being extra. I sat him up on the bar stool and made him some cereal. If I can be honest, babies and toddlers are just cuteness overload! They are still learning and growing, still widely dependent on the parent for every area of life, their heads are still the biggest part of their body, and they light up when they see you and for the most part, don’t mind your lips all over their face all day everyday.

Ok, maybe he cares just a little bit.
Ok, maybe he cares just a little bit about my obsessive kisses!

So as I walked over to Elijah while he was minding his own business, eating his cereal, I planted yet another kiss on his cheek. I then looked over at my oldest son who was quietly eating his cereal, seemingly lost in his own thoughts. And it hit me, besides bedtime, I hardly ever kiss him! So I decided then and there he was about to get a big wet one, and a small part of me was nervous that he would reject me because he’s such a big boy now and is too old for kisses blah blah blah. I did it anyway. The smile he gave me literally warmed my heart and made me a little misty.

REVELATION: HE STILL NEEDS MY KISSES! HE STILL NEEDS MY AFFECTION! It doesn’t matter how old he gets or how much his independence grows and his dependence on me decreases, he will always need and desire the physical display of my love, because I’m his mommy. Now he won’t always ask and demand it and will undoubtedly resist it one day, but it’s up to me to freely show them just how much I love them, and that sometimes starts with a simple kiss. <3

Our mommy/son date to the movies last month! He frowned up when I told him we were going on a date, ha!
My oldest and I on our mommy/son date to the movies earlier this year! He frowned up when I told him we were going on a date, and he got my kisses!

I believe the Lord guides us each and everyday in our parenting if we allow Him too, and today I am thankful for that reminder that my son still needs my kisses.  Now I’d like to hear from you! Could your relationship with your children use a boost in affection? If so, I encourage you to make the first move! Hug them, plant a kiss on their face, and tell them you love them.

Related Board Discussions:

Big” Kids and Affection

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10 Reasons You Know You’re a Boy Mom

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10 Reasons You Know You’re a Boy Mom

I grew up in a blended family, according to what’s politically correct. My mom and dad both had children from previous relationships before they married, and then had three children together. In our immediate household, there were my two older sisters, me in the middle, and then two little brothers behind me.

Those little brothers TORTURED ME! Especially the one that’s 17 months my junior. He did whatever he could to annoy, distract, and divert my attention away from whatever it was I was doing to him. And his goal was to get me to squeal, shriek, fight, chase, and engage in a wrestling match. Most of the times I rewarded his efforts with my emotional and passionate reactions. He often took off running with his bare-chest, tight-fitted shorts, twinkling eyes and snaggle-toothed smile. I charged right behind him, swinging and praying for contact.

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Why We Shouldn’t Praise Our Children

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pexels-photo-94990-large
Courtesy of Pixaby

The church I attend has a Mom2Mom class and we’ve studied numerous books by the highly proclaimed childhood behavior expert, Dr. Kevin Leman. It was during one of these studies that I heard, for the first time, that we should NOT praise our children with the typical “yay, good job!” Instead, we were told to encourage them.

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That Time My Husband Bought Me Lingerie

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lingerie
Courtesy of Pixaby

First off let me say that motherhood is the biggest honor and gift. I remember when I was expecting my first son, a good friend described my impending birth experience as an opportunity to assist God in a miracle. And boy was that statement accurate. I’m going to tell you how growing and delivering babies made me give my husband a major side eye when he bought me lingerie, but first let me tell you what these kids did to my body to cause the side eye!

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